I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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