For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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