we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
