Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Ketchup is God's man juice
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
