It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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