my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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