"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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