office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
