No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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