I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
