He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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