btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
