i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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