They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize