SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
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