so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
