i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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