Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Please don't give away my fajitas
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
