so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
