Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
