I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
