I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
