I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
