there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Randomize
