I can't watch pbs sober anymore
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
