Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
