Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
