I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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