You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
