Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize