I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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