I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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