The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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