weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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