And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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