after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Randomize
