I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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