But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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