spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
