He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
