You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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