OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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