I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
