got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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