Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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