well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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