it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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