I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
