Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
