White coat. Heels.
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
